Wednesday, July 28, 2010

Review: Speed (1994)

Director: Jan de Bont
Starring: Keanu Reeves, Sandra Bullock, Dennis Hopper

"Oh! In two hundred years we've gone from "I regret but I have one life to give for my country" to "Fuck you!"?"
-Howard Payne

I’m going to have to write this review fast, before the bomb goes off. If I review slower than 50 mph, then we all go up in flames and I’ll never be able to reach the talked-about 100 reviews for the site! Speed is a movie made in 1994 starring Keanu Reeves, Dennis Hopper and Sandra Bullock. Hopper is lame, Reeves is lamer and Bullock is cute. The plot revolves around a cop (Reeves) who has to stop a money-hungry psychopath (Hopper) from blowing up a bus. But indeed, it’s rigged like a game – the bus has to keep going at about 50 miles per hour, or else the bus will explode!

This movie is just full of tension. The plot moves fast and is full of excitement on every level. Reeves must find a way to stop the bomb and apprehend Hopper, and fast. I found the script corny and blatantly stupid at times, but even then, it wasn’t a major detractor, and I could overlook it once the movie kicked into gear. Everything in this movie that could possibly go wrong actually does happen – first they have to defuse a bomb in an elevator, then the hour-long bus escapade, and finally a deadly date in a subway car…all ending in some sort of explosion every time; how tiring must that get? I can only imagine how annoyed that must make Reeves…but then, he’s a lame actor anyway, and can’t properly convey annoyance to begin with. So all I can do is imagine anyway. Still, though. It’s worth considering the ramifications of a mind getting too used to explosions. Eventually, they must become trite.

Uh oh. I didn’t review it fast enough.


Phew! Made it out in the nick of time through an extremely implausible and yet bad-ass stunt that you’d have to be either on drugs or as blandly heroic as Keanu Reeves to attempt. Now I can finish up this review properly…well, most of the end is Sandra Bullock carrying the entire movie alone while Dennis Hopper cackles and over-acts like a moron – but I suppose that’s kind of entertaining on its own. In a way detrimental to him, more than anything. But I still really enjoyed it. It’s a fun movie. It manages to create a lot of big, stupid explosions and a ton of gripping tension, and the fact that it can overcome the often lame acting and dialogue says a lot. Hey, I liked it. I’d probably watch it again. Just not too fast – I’ve still got some other stuff to review, too.